I was recently in discussion with a mom at a crossroads with her adult son when I came to the conclusion that we sometimes have to live the life WE WANT to live. We have to let others stand for their actions.
There are too many times we find ourselves trying to pick up the pieces of everyone else's lives. This tends to be more common between a parent/child relationship, but we have all seen it or even been there. But where does it end?
I am not a parent, so I don't have a lot of grounds for my opinion, BUT I do think that at some point in WE HAVE TO LET GO! We have to let them fall. We have to let them fail. We have to let them make the mistakes OR how else will they learn??
I find this to be true even in my fourth grade classroom. Granted, it is on a much smaller scale! BUT nevertheless the lessons are the same! It doesn't matter how many times I can tell them how to do something, THEY WILL STILL DO IT HOWEVER THEY WANT!! Frustrating?!?! Yes! I know! But sometimes they just have to learn on their own.
In a utopia, we would all learn from others mistakes. But in the REAL WORLD... we have to learn the hard way. Sad but true.
We have to stop making up excuses for others. Yes, even our children. Even in the fourth grade. We need and THEY need to learn to be RESPONSIBLE.
Our society has turned into one big excuse. Well, she's a product of her environment. Well, she hasn't had a good example in her life. Well, he was picked on as a child. Well, there were no parents around to guide him. The list of excuses goes on and on. We have all heard them, and we have ALL said them. BUT I believe it is time to take responsibility. A twenty year old SHOULD take responsibility for their actions because they are an ADULT not pawn it off to the "circumstances" when they were younger or the "circumstances" they are in at the time!!!
The wisest woman I know (my grammal, Cleo at 95 years old) has NEVER talked about her parents or herself making excuses for her actions or anyone else's. AND trust me, she is a woman of many stories! Back then, there were no excuses. You knew when you did wrong, you fessed up to it, and life went on. Now, we are EXPECTED TO ACCEPT them! Really???
It seems we have fallen into the never ending cycle of excuses. Will we ever get out?